There is this thing in life that I hate.
That thing is making mistakes.
This is unfortunate for many reasons. The main reason being that I am a human, who therefore, is doomed to make a mistake every now and then. I do seem to have made an unfortunate amount of them recently though. I am coming to think of this summer as “The Summer of Mistakes”.
They have come about through under-thinking, over-thinking, and assuming. The easiest ones to handle are the ones that I stumble into completely innocently- the ones that I could not have done anything to prevent.
But, oh- those ones that could have been avoided…
They weigh so heavily on me.
Does this happen to anyone else? One would think that after making so many of them, it wouldn’t sting quite so much anymore. But it does.
There are a few things that I have been reminding myself of as a way of coping with the waves of self-accusation that tend to follow my mistakes. (I have found that it is better to have truths to hang onto than to slip willingly into the awful darkness of believing that I am worthless.)
- Perfection has only ever existed on earth in the Garden of Eden and Jesus.
- I don’t love other people any less when they make a mistake. They will extend the same grace to me.
- This is why Jesus died. To cover me and deliver me from myself. To wallow in mistakes and allow them to consume you is stepping away from Jesus and closer to Satan.
- Making a mistake is a highly effective way of learning a valuable life lesson. (I can only assume that I shall emerge from this summer highly refined.)
- It will feel better. It won’t always feel as bad as it does initially.
- Look at the sky. We really are surrounded with God’s love. “Your steadfast love, O Lord, extends to the heavens, your faithfulness to the clouds.” –Psalm 36:5
Sometimes I tell myself all these things and I still don’t feel better.
Sometimes I just can’t get past myself.
These things are still true though.
I have never before in my life been so aware of the grace of God.